It seems like every time Erik Arnesen takes the mound (as he will on Tuesday night), I’m left to ask, “Is there anything he can’t do?” Everything that’s been asked of him from the Nationals’ organization, he has done and he has done well. He has both started games and he’s come out of the bullpen in relief. He’s worn out I-81 being shuttled back and forth between Harrisburg and Syracuse. He enters tonight’s game with a 5-1 record and a 1.98 ERA in 15 appearances with the Senators.

Photo courtesy John C. Whitehead / The Patriot-News

I did some journalistic digging and discovered some Erik Arnesen facts that everyone may or may not be aware of (H/T to ZJ for his help):

• Erik Arnesen throws righthanded only because a pitch from his dominant left hand would tear a seam in the space-time continuum.

• While renovating Metro Bank Park, team officials decided it was best if the stadium was built around Erik Arnesen.

• Erik Arnesen doesn’t throw a changeup. He throws a fastball and just slows down the earth’s rotation before the ball gets to the batter.

• The term “scoreless innings” became commonplace and accepted than the more accurate description “Erik Arnesen innings”.

• Erik Arnesen almost got struck by a batted ball once. Only the ball took a 90 degree right turn in front of the mound and settled patiently at first base.

• Friz Freleng came up with the Looney Tunes episode of “Baseball Bugs” where Bugs Bunny beats the Gashouse Gorillas playing all of the positions after watching Erik Arnesen defeat an opponent in the very same manner.

• Erik Arnesen doesn’t allow walks, there are some batters he just chooses not to pitch to.

• When Erik Arnesen’s pitching, coaching visits to the mound take place only because Randy Tomlin misses Erik.

• Erik Arnesen is the only guy who can both start a game and pick up the save.

• Whenever Erik Arnesen pitches, the groundskeepers work extra hard every inning because his sweat turns the grass around the mound to daffodils. And it’s not sweat…it’s Awesome in liquid form.

• Erik Arnesen slowly strolls or lightly jogs in from the bullpen so he doesn’t reveal yet another one of his super powers…super speed!

• Abbott and Costello settled on the routine “Who’s on First?” after they realized the answer to “Who’s Pitching?” is always Erik Arnesen.

• Only a chosen few know this secret, but Erik Arnesen is really Chuck Norris in disguise.